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Published on ELDR.com (http://eldr.com)

Staying Sexy without a Partner

The things that stop you having sex with age are the same as those that stop you riding a bicycle (bad health, thinking it looks silly, no bicycle)…The important thing is never drop sex for any long period—keep yourself going solo if you don't for the time being have a partner.
- Alex Comfort in The Joy of Sex [1]

Juicy is an Attitude
Haven't you noticed that when you're getting plenty of sex, people are attracted to you as if you were oozing irresistible come-hithers, while when you're desperate for sex or a relationship, you might as well be wearing a sign that says, "I have a stinky, fatal disease—stay far away"?

Being sexually juicy doesn't depend on the flow of our vaginal secretions or the presence of a partner in our life but on physical and emotional well-being, mental attitude, and love of sensuality.

We can feel and look sexy and attractive, whether we're in a relationship or not. Looking good has nothing to do with whether our thighs are tight or dimply, our breasts perky or floppy, our face unlined or road-mapped. Any partner who would judge us this way would be much too superficial for a relationship at this stage of our lives anyway. Sexiness is how we feel about ourselves and how we present ourselves to the world, with or without a partner.

We are lively and sexy when we live our lives fully, doing the activities that keep us energetic, creative, and happy—whether we're accompanied by a lover or not. The more we strut our beautiful stuff with confidence, the more others are attracted to us.

Sexually Seasoned Women Speak about Solo Sex

When I was single and my grown son was out of the house, I discovered sex with myself in a wonderful way. I had a mad, passionate, love affair with myself. I got fabulous lingerie and bought myself champagne. It was just me and a vibrator. Some days, nobody else can do it like you. –Monica, 60

I left my last relationship about twelve years ago and wanted to be a hermit. I continued to be sexual with myself and got pretty wonderful results with that method. When I felt sexual, I made love to myself, just like I comforted myself as a kid. Now I'm turned on all the time. –Claire, 66

I was maybe sixty-five before I ever did it. I was talking with a girlfriend who was between relationships, and she said she masturbated. I never even thought of such a thing. My first time, I knew just where to go. I tried it with the jets in the hot tub, and I found the right spot. It was the best sex I ever had! –Jaime, 73

Sometimes I masturbate—what else can you do? It's better than going out and picking up people. My drive is still strong. –Matilda, 78

Excerpted from Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex after Sixty [2] by Joan Price. Learn more about Joan Price » [3]



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